I can't believe how terrible I feel at night...I mean, in the middle of the night, when I wake up 17 times to pee. When I get out of bed, I have to hold my breasts so they don't move even the smallest amount. They are like giant bruises...like sacks of pain affixed to my chest in a not really secure fashion, so they seem to jostle at the slightest movement and...it feels like I've been stabbed. I've tried wearing a bra...but the constriction bothers my chest and stomach. Weird, I know. I've tried different bras... Once I'm upright for the day, it's really much better (plus I can wear a bra)...it's like at night, my boobs are in some kind of pregnancy pain overdrive.
I am now pretty firmly in the grip of morning sickness, but even before this last week of nausea, I felt queasy and yucky only in the middle of the night. What is this about? Is this a common thing - to feel really shitty at night and okay during the day? It's odd and a little unfortunate because it's hard to get back to sleep after my frequent bathroom visits. Hmmmm...such an interesting experience.
Kiyomi is back from her field work, so she can help feed me. I know, that's kind of pathetic, but yesterday when I felt so barfy, it was really hard to even look at food...so, it's nice to have someone do that preparation part done and then...I can eat...and try not to puke.
On the upside, yesterday when I was lying down most of the afternoon incapable of much of anything, I got to see what VH1 believes is the best hip-hop song of all time (woo-hoo!)...and, you know, some of the other top trillion hip hop numbers...or whatever ridiculous number they count down from. It was Public Enemy's "Fight the Power." In case you were dying of curiosity. Surprisingly, all that bitches and hoes talk didn't make me even sicker. Actually, I was totally interested by it...I mean, once I got past the fact that for every 3 minutes of the program there were 2 minutes of commercials.
I do have to say this, hip-hop may be the most self-reflexive genre ever. I mean, every few years, some rap group's big hit is all about how the industry has gone to shit and no one is making TRUE rap music anymore. It's so fascinating. I mean, I think other musical genres have individuals who talk about this...but not so many songs purely about what the genre is, whether others are truly living up to its tenets, or the characteristics that make specific groups TRUE MCs...I mean, it's pretty unique...and sort of bizarre. I am trying to imagine other musical genres having so many songs that are lyrically so completely comprised of claims of awesomeness...like, "I'm the best guitarist, I can play some crazy-ass riffs..." or "I sing the prettiest, yeah, my range is three octaves, you motherfucker...top that"...I don't know...I can't see it.
Don't get me wrong - I in no way believe this correlates to rap stars having the hugest egos (well, except in the case of that insane egomaniac Kanye West). I have no doubt that mega stars of all musical genres can potentially have huge egos...even if only certain types of musicians spend so many lines singing about how awesome they are. I guess this is why hip hop stars have feuds...like 17 times more often than anyone else. It's all about being the image in a really direct way. (Let's face it, it's all about the image for any commercial musician...just more overtly in hip hop?) Anyway, it was an interesting program. And, I still have to say, LL Cool J and 50 Cent are pretty fucking attractive...well, physically. It's less fun hearing 50 Cent talk, though LL Cool J's attractive doesn't diminish quite so much when he talks. Plus, he was fricking hilarious on 30 Rock. So, you know...there's that distraction when you feel like puking!
No comments:
Post a Comment